THE FAKIES GO TO SO CAL

Being a skateboarder in the Pacific Nor’west ‘70s, it wasn’t a gimme. If ya weren’t a jock or a Skynyrd-luvin’ redneck, you were nuthin’. I was nuthin’. My story started outta necessity. I didn’t fit anywhere in Aberdeen’s ‘70s mainstream, so skateboardin’ WAS necessary! Between the mocking, fighting, cops, seclusion, and rain, ya were forced to ride with yer chin up and yer chest out. It changed me – empowered me. I was able to think outside the backwards box. My bedroom walls were cluttered with DOGTOWN shots of Jay Boy Adams, Mad Dog Alva, Shogo, Biniak, ripped from Skateboarder Mag and Skateboard World. I studied each pic like I was there, witnessin’ it as it was happenin’. DOGTOWN was where the action was! This energy was my food. I devoured it. There were a couple of locals who shared my hunger and we skated often. But ya can only stand in one spot for so long. I needed to stretch my skate legs. It was time. Seems everything’s about timing…

I met SWERVO in ‘79, when he was just 13. He’d already been banned for life from the local skatepark in Oly and was ready to conquer the rest of the skate world. I would transport him and our bud, Greg Todd, (R.I.P.) to the big city to see (pre-Hank) Black Flag, Circle Jerks, The Fartz, etc. Through the mid-‘80s, Swervo and his bands became quite notorious fixtures in the state capital’s skate & punk scenes.

I met MICRO in ’78, at an Oly skate comp. He looked about a half dozen years younger than his 14 years and ripped well beyond his age with style and aggression. His frontside floaters were legendary and the dude could hustle anyone. So smooth, in fact, ya thunk ya made out like a bandit when yer car went missin’. Just another Nor’west skate legend & punker who fed upon squaresville.

TOMMO, “Bonehead” they call him. Met him ‘round ’80. One seriously smart, talented ‘n tuff sonuvabiznitch with a heart the size o’ his hairy barrel chest. I’ve witnessed, firsthand, 2 gigantic college jocks flee from his jovial half-cocked smirk and dead black stare. At an early age, he was an elusive figure in the late ‘70s L.A. skate & punk scene. Then migrated back to Oly and started all over again. In ’83, he moved to my pad in Seattle where he became a fixture in its “butting” music scene.

JAKS Team seems to be a common thread and that’s where EZ RIDER barges in. This whippersnapper slammed into my life in the mid-2000s. A ripper in every sense of the word. Plug a set of earbuds in him and he’ll tear apart anything ya got, whether it’s skatable or not.

Thus, with 40+ years of skatin’ TOGETHER, and a combined total of around 190+ (with EZ included), and more than a handful of bands between us, The Fakies were bound to happen, formin’ in 2004. When I popped in to JUICE Magazine HQ and chatted with Dan, I mentioned our SKATERAWK combo. He said, “Ya gotta play here on our balcony!” Well, how could one refuse? I mentioned the invite to the guys, and we immediately started settin’ Dan’s kind words into action and the timing couldn’t have been more perfect! – Timmo Jak

THE FAKIES LEAVE THEIR MARK ON THE NUDE BOWL. 

Micro: 5.24.18. On the morning of the trip, we met and disassembled the boards into bags.

EZ: Big drama about how we were gonna pack the boards and how many we were allowed to bring.

Timmo: We thought that golf bags would be ideal for a bunch of boards. It wasn’t a bad idea, but…

Micro: We went with a duffle bag that didn’t close.

Swervo: I went to pick up that duffle bag and, on the way home, I went over a car on my motorcycle. Jacked it up. We put an extra 40 pounds in with all of EZ’s boards. That broke the eyelet on the bag.

EZ: You need skateboards for different situations!

Micro: We were each allowed two boards except for EZ, who brought five.

EZ: Two. I only brought two.

Timmo: Yeah, right.

“It was a beautiful day for skating.”

EZ: The other three were communal. Anybody was allowed to ride any of them. 

Timmo: We flew into Palm Springs. As soon as we got off the plane, Swervo ran into El Gato.

EZ: “Hell yeah! El Gato!” He was coming back from Dubai.

Timmo: Welcome to Palm Springs!

Micro: We hit a Walmart and got $8 sleeping bags for the week AND a can of red spray paint.

Swervo: And beer and went straight to The Yard.

EZ: We were off the plane and at the pool in 10 minutes!

“We were off the plane and at the pool in 10 minutes!”

Swervo: It was super hot, but it was SUPER nice.

Micro: No sunscreen, no liquids, just straight into the Palm Springs heat of the day.

Timmo: We flew out of Seattle at 58 degrees. We fly into Palm Springs and it’s 98 degrees.

Tommo: A nice little backyard bowl, just like you’d expect in any backyard anywhere, really.

Swervo: That was utilized, with Micro launching and EZ going boneless off the cinderblock wall.

EZ: I launched my board into the neighbor’s yard!

Micro: Is the neighbor cool? Does he have dogs?

EZ: They were good people. I liked the Micro rock ride with me holding up the rock.

Swervo: Then we went to the Palm Springs Park.

Micro: The Nude Bowl replica. 

Swervo: I was afraid of the sun. I was so burnt.

Micro: Your face was all puffy and red. I thought we were gonna lose you on the first afternoon.

“It was the trip of a lifetime.”

EZ: I talked to the lady at the pool next door and I asked how much just to do a quick dunk. She said, “$4 a head.” That’s as low as she could go. 

Timmo: We managed and cooled off in the pro shop and then it was off to the Nude Bowl.

SWERVO GRINDS THE NUDE. PHOTO © MICRO

Swervo: Totally killer. The crazy drive, everything about the Nude Bowl is great. 

Tommo: The search was interesting. Steve was saying to go the complete opposite way.

Swervo: When we got to the Nude Bowl, the adrenaline was crazy. I’ve skated it a couple times, and this time was just perfect timing. Not too hot, the sun was going down. You get into the thing and you realize the beautiful thing about some of the California spots, like Baldy and the Nude – it’s rough as shit. It’s old and it’s gnarly. Like whoa, this is gnarly after riding Palm Springs and The Yard. Then you start to throw down. Hit that coping, man. Lefthand kidneys, all the same. Huck into it.

“When we got to the Nude Bowl, the adrenaline was crazy.”

Timmo: That was definitely a hucker, for sure. 

Micro: And that red spray paint? We got the Fakies logo sprayed on the Nude Bowl.

Timmo: We were there for a while, until dusk. We were afraid the rental wasn’t gonna make it to the bottom of the hill before dark. Driving back, the van was blowing all over the place. Those Palm Desert winds were howlin’ like crazy.

EZ: I just thought Tommo was drunk. 

Timmo: And then back to headquarters. 

Tommo: We got our first taste of couch crashing.

Micro: Cabana, poolside, lawn chairs… I had my own private suite with big pillows and teddy bears.

EZ: Elitist.

Tommo: Big floating beds on the pool. Hot tub.

Timmo: It was perfect.

Micro: In the morning, we assembled our downhill boards and went to Glendora to visit Ronin and hit GMR.

EZ: Before we got to Glendora and met up with Fred (Ronin Truck kingpin), we spotted that pool from the freeway and had to pull off. We made two or three passes to really dial it in. Then Micro and I went to the door and it was shady as hell, man! 

EZ AND TOMMO HOPPING FENCES FOR THE POOL CHECK. PHOTO © SWERVO

Micro: Bars on windows, looked like a meth house.

EZ: It was a sweet-looking pool. 

Swervo: I checked it out, but too much water in it. Too much work. We were already late to meet Fred.

Swervo: His shop turned out to be awesome. 

Tommo: Full Ronin factory tour and museum tour. 

Timmo: The Fred museum is freakin’ amazing. That Jay Adams board… the one that we’ve seen him ride in a lot of the old pictures with Jay Adams written on the bottom of it—to actually hold that board! The history behind it!

Micro: He said you could ride it if you wanted.

Tommo: No. We wouldn’t dare.

Micro: The evolution of Ronin trucks is cool.

Swervo: Getting out of there without buying a board was a feat.

Tommo: THAT was a struggle!

Swervo: Then we went to the GMR. I’d seen it on YouTube and it didn’t look gnarly, but driving up that thing was scary as shit. THIS is a hill.

Micro: It didn’t look doable.

“We skated the Nude, Baldy and GMR, but skating those chunky Venice sidewalks with Tonan was the best.”

Swervo: At Rowena in Oregon, we drove up that hill and it looked gnarly, but it wasn’t. In my head, I was going, “It’s not that gnarly, even though it looks gnarly.” Then Micro says, “We gotta do it!”

Swervo: I was about to yield in with Timmo and Bonehead and go, “Oh, it’s nice to look at it.” I didn’t have leathers or nothing. No full-face helmet.

EZ: I was nervous as shit!

Swervo: Micro was like, “We’re doing it.” I’m like, “Okay, it’s a go.” And EZ says, “Yah, all right!”

EZ: We’re here. We have to do this.

Swervo: I’m so glad we did. We gotta go back.

EZ: We gotta go back to get to know it better.

Swervo: I foot-braked the whole thing. 

Timmo: In front of the dude playin’ the rock drum kit on the side of the road halfway down!).

EZ: We were charging it for the first time. I didn’t know what the hell was up around the next turn, but when you do you lock into that turn, it kinda hugs you in. Then, whoa, there’s another one.

Micro: Rail around a corner that would just hug you in, and you pop out, scared as shit, and then you look down and the hill drops away into another hairpin corner.

Swervo: It was a beautiful hill. I was high for like two hours after!

Everyone: Thank you Fred Ronin!

Micro: Then we rolled straight up to Baldy. We were off course and used satellite phone images to find the pipe coming out of the side of the mountain. It turned out we were only half a mile from it. We just couldn’t see it.

TIMMO ROLLIN’ THUNDER AT BALDY. PHOTO © MICRO

EZ: The locals in the neighborhood that we parked in were tough! They were ready to go.

Micro: We parked down the street, got all our gear and boards together, everything set…

Timmo: Ready to bail quickly out of the van, and then the van door wouldn’t open all the way.

Micro: The van door jams, and three of you guys were trying to cram out of the crack.

Swervo: You get that high alert feeling. We’re trespassing, highly visible, but we’re going NOW!

“You get that high alert feeling. We’re trespassing, highly visible, but we’re going NOW!”

Timmo: You gotta go. Go GO GO!

Micro: We get down into the spillway and go to walk the plank across the gap. Swervo was first across. The 2×6 was split nearly all the way down! The whole thing damn near buckled in half! He got to the other side and grabbed the second 2×6 with all the nails sticking out of it to lay over the top of the first.

Swervo: Later, we found there was a ladder on the other side.

Micro: You wouldn’t have known the ladder was there unless you got down the spillway to see it.

Swervo: Baldy was as rough and gnarly as ever. 

“Baldy was as rough and gnarly as ever.”

Micro: Scary.

Timmo: It was great. No matter how rough it was, you had no problem getting past vert.

Swervo: It seemed smaller than you remember. It’s not that big. Like 14 foot. It was cool. Then we went up to the very top of it inside. Someone had left underwear in there. It’s so dark you can’t see. You’re sure someone took a shit in there. That was the only thing I thought about! I’m like, I’m gonna go through some turds… But you had to do it!

Tommo: That’s probably why Timmo slid out.

TOMMO & MICRO AT BALDY. PHOTO © TIMMO

Timmo: I let you go ahead of me on that one.

Swervo: We get done and it was epic. Then Micro said that he’d rather walk the plank than take the ladder. He could’ve walked right out.

EZ: Micro walked the plank, and these guys walked the ladder. I was like, “I’m not leaving Micro! No man left behind. We’re brothers. Woo!” Right after that you said, “You guys could skate the spillway. Here’s your boards.” Bang!

Swervo: In 1987, some kid took me there. He said, “Just skate down the spillway and I’ll pick you up at the road down there.” I remember doing that.

EZ: Well, we couldn’t find it.

TIMMO & EZ NO WAY OUT AT BALDY. PHOTO © SWERVO

Swervo: It must have changed in the last 30 years because that out wasn’t there anymore, so it suddenly got more interesting.

EZ: It was a sweet ride. It was dry, and you’re cruising like it’s a city street that you can see for a mile and a half, but no cars are coming. It was just me and Micro jamming. We’d duck down through some funky seaweed and some carpet moss. “I wonder where this road leads? How long have we been going?”

Swervo: I got a text saying, “Thanks for telling us about the cow grate!” I said, “I don’t remember a cow grate!”

Micro: We’re going on at like 20 miles an hour, and he’s like, “What’s that up there?”

Swervo: You were past where I got off before.

Micro: We were miles past.

EZ: I was like, “What is that, Micro?” It just got closer and closer. It was a big washed out cattle grate, 8 foot, steel bars across. Not good.

Micro: You couldn’t gap it. No way.

Timmo: In the meantime, we were in full panic, waiting for these guys to make it down.

Micro: Before we got to the first long tunnel, you texted me. I said, “There’s NO out, man! We’re going to the ocean.”

Swervo: I’m thinkin’ you might have to hike back seven miles.

Micro: The only thing we saw to remotely get us out of there was an occasional single strand of barbwire fencing dangling from above. 

EZ: Then when we go into a tunnel that’s like – dude, it’s for real dark in there. Then we started getting worried about homeless bat children and we skated a little faster.

Timmo: And it started getting darker …

EZ: When the sun started to set, we stopped for a smoke break and looked up and saw California Highway Patrol cars, and realized we were in back of the Claremont police station, 6.8 miles away from where we started. We finally found an out.

Swervo: You guys were having fun.

“That out wasn’t there anymore, so it suddenly got more interesting.”

EZ: We were having a blast the whole time.

Micro: Scary, but fun. In the back of my mind, I’m thinking, it’s getting dark. I hope we get out soon, because this isn’t funny anymore.

EZ: When it started to get dark, it started to kick in that, “Oh, this could suck.”

Swervo: We knew we had those $8 sleeping bags in case you guys had to bag in there.

EZ: But we didn’t have the $8 sleeping bags!

Swervo: At the same time that we were trying to find you, we spotted some steel fullpipes in a         construction yard, but it got too dark.

EZ: We came out at the police station and sat there for 45 minutes while you guys were lost…

Timmo: There were three streets named the same thing, so we got lost. We ended up hitting ‘em all… It’s always the last one.

Micro: Then these gangbangers came along and threatened us. 

EZ: They definitely were not ready for two older fellows in pads and skateboards, hanging out across from the cop shop, smoking.

Swervo: Then we cruised to Upland, but it was closed, so we went to Fontana as they were closing. We skated in as the guy who was trying to tell us they were closed ran to the office.

Tommo: “Hold on, you need helmets and I’m gonna need you to sign the waiver.”

Timmo: All we need is a couple minutes!

Swervo: We got in some fun run and go rides.

Timmo: That was fun. Fontana is pretty bitchin’.

Swervo: On to In-N-Out Burger, and back to Palm Springs driving in the 100mph winds. 

Micro: Whiskey winds. That night was the 5AM pool party.

Tommo: We raged, man. We raged.

EZ: I thought the second night was Timmo’s weird Troma films. I stayed up and watched that chick kill that guy with a carrot!

Tommo: Steve hits the zipper alarm at 5. 5:05.

Swervo: Tour of Palm Springs with Bennett and Susie.

Micro: Then that robot sculpture park.

“Tour of Palm Springs… sculpture park.”

EZ: That was awesome.

Tommo: While we were going around, riding on these super smooth streets in the van, missing the Tour Of The Stars that’s going on in Bennett’s jeep, we’re thinking, “Let’s get the boards, so we can jump on this tour too!” So we did. Then me and EZ be-bopped down the main drag, into the open arms of Palm Springs. This nice skateboarding couple out for a Sunday skate. EZ with his little earbuds…

NEVER GROW UP. PHOTO © SWERVO

EZ: That’s how I roll, man.

Micro: Then we rolled straight to Venice to Juice and then we had to quickly make our way to Guitar Center for $6,000 worth of free gear rental.

Swervo: That’s good for your credit rating too. 

EZ: You stashed me and Timmo at Juice HQ and we got to hang on the beach. It was awesome.

Timmo: Hooked up with our JAKS brother, Scotty. That was very cool, hadn’t seen him in a long while.

Swervo: Juice is a great scene, great atmosphere. The lady, Tina, with the food, made the best food.

THE FAKIES SKATERAWK VENICE. PHOTO © DAN LEVY

And you’re in Venice Beach. California. The party is starting! They push the show until later, so we go skate. Tonan went with us the first time.

Micro: We skated down to ride the snake run.

EZ: Those other Zephyr kids went too.

“Juice is a great scene, great atmosphere. And you’re in Venice Beach. California. The party is starting!”

Swervo: Comin’ back with Tonan, he said, “Hey, stop!” You guys went on while me and Timmo went to Tonan’s place, which is kind of a dugout beneath a house and he had a bunch of cool art.

Timmo: Cool sculptures and shit.

Swervo: Sculptures of cutting graffiti off the wall and taping it together, big waves, cartoon figures, surfing. Then we skated back for the gig.

JUICE HQ PACKED INSIDE AND OUT FOR THE FAKIES SHOW. PHOTO © HEIDI LEMMON

EZ: Were you guys out back for the discussion with Mr. L.A. and his Mercedes? We said, “Hey, you’re gonna have to move. We’ve got someone pulling in here. It’s his party.” It was Jeff Ho’s induction party to the Skateboarding Hall Of Fame. Then Jeff pulls up in a beat-up station wagon!

Micro: Mr. L.A. was 7-feet tall – pure muscle.

EZ: Gold everything. He says, “This is what I’m moving for?” 

Micro: There was a little altercation, but it was fine. They worked it out.

Swervo: Then the gig came and it was cool. I guess it sounded good. All we could hear on the balcony was bass, so I couldn’t hear nothing.

Micro: All I could hear was Timmo, because his guitar was right next to me.

Swervo: Bonehead kicked us into “Armageddon Outta Here”. We just extended it and, for me, that was the best part of the whole gig.

JUICE JAM. PHOTO © DAN LEVY

Micro: Tommo didn’t want that song to end. 

Tommo: I just love that song.

EZ: It was killer from out on the beach. The sound was great and everybody was hanging out. Skate session going on out front …

“The sound was great and everybody was hanging out. Skate session going on out front.”

Micro: The live webcam feed was awesome too.

Timmo: To be able to meet Jeff Ho was definitely a high mark and the hospitality of Dan and Terri was completely unforgettable. All the folks there, Shota Kubo, Shogo Kubo’s son, got to meet him. So many wonderful folks. Our friend Libby was there.

THE FAKIES & VENICE LOCS AT JUICE HQ. PHOTO © DAN LEVY

Timmo: We met the girl with the key… Kaycee.

Everyone: KAYCEE!

Swervo: After the gig, we decide to go skating to the liquor store with Tonan.

“After the gig, we decide to go skating to the liquor store with Tonan.”

Swervo: We end up just skating…

Timmo: …and skating, and skating, and skating.

NIGHT SESSIONS IN VENICE WITH TONAN ARE NEVER DULL. PHOTO © EZ

EZ: Bonehead came over and said, “I don’t wanna go to a bar. Let’s go skate the park!” We said, “Tonan, we just wanna skate.” He goes, “Cool! We’ll go to the marina and smoke some weed. That’s where all the boats roll up, so maybe we’ll steal a boat and go for a ride.” When Micro comes out of the liquor store, we say, “Micro, the plan is we’re gonna smoke some weed and steal a boat.” He says, “Great, let’s do it. I’m in!”

Swervo: We’re skating in the dark down the sidewalks. It was one of the highlights of the trip. We skated the Nude, Baldy and GMR, but skating those chunky Venice sidewalks with Tonan was the best.

“To be able to meet Jeff Ho was definitely a high mark.”

EZ: Getting the inside line with him pointing out all the best cracks to crash on.

Micro: That made us feel like Z-Boys, going to the Canal and smoking pot where so many had before.

Swervo: Tonan’s stories were pretty cool. Talking about Shogo and Muir and all that. 

Everyone: Thanks Tonan!

LIQUOR SHOP STOP. PHOTO © TONAN RUIZ

Timmo: The next morning, breakfast …Then there was a HUGE show opening in downtown LA, Beyond The Streets, so Juice had a lot to do, so we got out of their hair by eight.

Micro:  We loaded the van and then went to half off breakfast down the boardwalk, then returned the gear and got a call.

Timmo: Dan needed some mags at the event.

EZ, JEFF HO & CHRISTIAN HOSOI – BEYOND THE STREETS IN DTLA. PHOTO © DAN LEVY

Micro: We got the mags and went to Beyond the Streets. Pulled up front, parked right at the gate. Rock star parking.

Timmo: We grabbed our JAKS colors and boards.

Micro: Rode through the exhibit on our boards.

Timmo: Cameras chasing us all the way through! 

Tommo: The ramps, man!

Micro: Listened to bands… 

“The gallery was amazing and the show was fantastic.”

Timmo: The gallery was amazing and the show was fantastic. There was so much cool shit that we’d never be able to see again.

Micro: The Banksy stuff…

Swervo: The ramps up to that vert wall were tight and everything in you is like, “I could really go for this, just throw in.” Then I had reservations.

EZ RIDES THE WALLS AT BEYOND THE STREETS WITH CHRISTIAN HOSOI & JEFF HO. PHOTO © DAN LEVY

Micro: Yeah, you’d get busted up real quick.

Swervo: It was a great show. Then I was like, “Let’s get lunch.” Someone recommended Philippe’s sandwich shop. Again we hit the streets. Just pushing down the sidewalk.

Timmo: Hadn’t done that much in a long time.

Micro: Me too. Feels great.

EZ: Philippe’s was really good.

Tommo: I didn’t know it was this Dodgers super spot. I was sitting there with my Giants hat on, wondering why everyone was mean-mugging me.

Swervo: Skating back to the art show, we bumped into Jesse Martinez. We were talking downhill and Maryhill and we noticed he had a real cool custom board that Hosoi made for him, which looked like a kickass downhill board.

Tommo: With downhill trucks and footstop, crazy!

Timmo: Hosoi, we need those boards up here! 

Swervo: Yeah! Get your ass to Maryhill. If you skateboard and you like going down a hill fast, check out Maryhillratz.com.

Timmo: Then we hooked up with our friend, Suzy Hutchinson, at Beyond The Streets …

Micro: Then we bee-lined for Huntington Beach because it was gonna get ‘dozed in two days. We rolled in just in time to get the last hour and a half of light. The first hour was rough because the sun is in your eyes, but then it dropped and all the pro shredders were there.

Timmo: Lance Mountain, Hosoi, Lester Kasai…

EZ: Navarette, Peter Hewitt, Omar Hassan… 

Tommo: The dream team.

Swervo: That was a great pool. Super nice. At that point, we were spent. It was worth skating, big time. Amazing they’d tear a bowl down like that.

Timmo: After that, it was back to Suzy’s.

EZ: Suzy’s was awesome.

Timmo: Home away from home. Suzy is the art director for the upgraded Mad Magazine.

Swervo: Her house was cool and full of wild art and knick-knacks.

EZ: Lots of little nooks to hide Fakies stickers in.

Timmo: That was nice. We just sat and bullshitted for a long while, had something to eat, and went to bed early.

EZ: What about the deli she told us to go to where the dessert case was propped up by an old Z-Flex skateboard?

Swervo: The morning breakfast coffee spot.

Tommo: We’re sitting eating and Micro’s making time with the barista and EZ says, “Hey, Tommo! Look what’s holding up that cooler. It’s an old skateboard.” Micro checks it out, and comes back with this sort of look on his face.

Micro: It was Tracker Full Tracks, Alva wheels, on a Z-Flex skateboard.

Timmo: Was it the wood or the fiberglass?

Micro: Wood. I woulda offered them some money and brought it home, but we didn’t have any room because there were too many Black Dog boards in the bag already. Drank some whiskey and threw rocks at the Crystal Cathedral. Then we rolled over to the Vans Combi Bowl.

Swervo: Which was free. Used to be pay to skate.

Timmo: It was bigger than I thought it was gonna be. And it was fast. Fast and super fun.

Swervo: Everyone started throwing down.

Micro: Made some great friends, some shredding locals…

EZ: Little super grom, probably gonna be an Olympic gold medalist.

Swervo: A few kids were radically dropping in and barely making it over the waterfall. Within 15 minutes, they were making it over the waterfall and making both sides. 

Swervo: The stoke was way off the charts.

Micro: Then we went to Laguna Beach to meet my brother-in-law. He said, “Meet us at this bar.” I said, “My buddies wanna swim, because we’re all hot and sweaty.” He said, “We’ll meet at this other bar instead.” 

“We got to hang on the beach. It was awesome.”

Tommo: Splash! Splash at Laguna Beach.

EZ: That was a nice place.

Tommo: Oh, it was a very nice place.

EZ: They weren’t ready for us.

Micro: A tiny little bar, and we come barnstorming through the hotel and down the elevators.

Micro: Lots of JAKS colors.

Swervo: Pretty sweaty.

Timmo: …and stinky!

Micro: We charged the bar and they didn’t know what to think.

EZ: Like if you guys look like that, in here, you must be somebody famous…

Timmo: No, we’re just old skateboarders, man!

Micro: They wanted nothing to do with us. Within 20 minutes, we were the life of the party and everyone wanted to join our table. 

EZ: And then in 25 minutes …

Tommo: We’re out swimming!

Timmo: Two of you brought bathing suits. One didn’t…

EZ: Suddenly, there was Tommo in his red skivvies.

Timmo: Posh locals standing up looking over the edge through the windows, watching you swim.

EZ: The best part was coming out, being all sandy and funky, and going, “Aw, shit, we gotta get back to the van, I’m gross, this sucks.” Then this woman comes out: “Boys? Here are some towels! The shower is right over there.” This place is awesome!

Micro: Casey’s looking out there and she goes, “What are they doing?” I said, “I think they’re chasing seagulls down the beach.” The woman at the bar starts laughing like, “Why can’t we have this much fun when we go out?” 

EZ: We probably sold about $10,000 worth of jeans vests that day, which would be one jean vest in Laguna Beach.

Swervo: Then it was off to Etnies.

Micro: Alex, my brother-in-law, had asked his buddy about Etnies and he said it was a 40,000 square foot park down by Laguna Beach. Everyone was raving about it and saying it’s one of the best parks in California.

Timmo: We were seriously getting pooped. We were ALL in, but we were slowing down a bit.

EZ: …We were on park 10,000.

Micro: Everything looked like it would be great. We roll in there, and they comp us—no charge.

Swervo: Thank you, Etnies.

Timmo: Everybody there was super cool.

Swervo: There was plenty to ride. 

Tommo: That really wacky amoeba thing …

Timmo: The one in the back? I loved that thing.

Micro: You had some good lines, I was trying to learn your lines in there. Swervo friggin’ rocked that cradle. You were like ten o’clock in there easy.

Swervo: Like the lefthand kidney, you know the line into those cradles. You need to hit the line. The amoeba would be great if you lived there and got to know it. 

Micro: That black pool, I loved that finish too.

Tommo: Shoutout to Miles at Etnies for playing the best music of any park I’ve ever been to. They were rockin’ it.

Micro: Then we roll back to Suzy’s.

Timmo: Our last night in Cali.

Micro: The grand finale.

Swervo: We wanted that clover bowl before we left. 

Micro: Bucket list. There was Nude Bowl and Baldy and, if it was possible, to get an invite to the Malibu Clover.

“Bucket list. There was Nude Bowl and Baldy and, if it was possible, to get an invite to the Malibu Clover.”

Swervo: We had pros say, “We can’t speed dial that one.”

EZ: Before we left Huntington, Hosoi asked where we were heading. We said our last stop was the Malibu clover. He smiled. “I’m gonna pray that you get in.” Then he said, “Oh, you got a key! You’re in.”

THE FAKIES MARK ONE OFF THE BUCKET LIST IN MALIBU. PHOTO © KAYCEE BREANN

Micro: And we were… Kaycee came through!

Timmo: She hooked us up. She texted the owner. 

Swervo: He was great, his dogs were great.

“It’s what you dream of as a kid. I’m gonna have a pool right there with another pool to skate.”

Micro: You should have met his chicken and his rooster was friggin’ amazing. It was like a dog.

MICRO TESTS THE COPING IN MALIBU. PHOTO © SWERVO

Swervo: It was a beautiful day for skating.

EZ: It’s what you dream of as a kid. I’m gonna have a pool right there with another pool to skate, view of the beach…

TIMMO WIPED OUT IN MALIBU PARADISE. PHOTO © SWERVO

Swervo: Perfect coping, everything beautiful.

Micro: Such an excellent bowl to end on.

“You could just drop in and do forever carve grinds and go on all three loops of the clover.”

Timmo: It was definitely the cherry on top.

SWERVO CRUISIN’ FRONTSIDE AT THE MALIBU CLOVER. PHOTO © TIMMO

Micro: You could just drop in and do forever carve grinds and go on all three loops of the clover.

EZ: There was an old JAKS team pin hung up on the side there, on the chicken house. Crazy!

Micro: We replicated the photo from our first album with Tim doing the frontside over the crew.

Swervo: Back in the van, we drive to the airport.

Tommo: And then we had to go back to real life.

Micro: I think there were martinis involved .

Timmo: It was a trip that we’ll never forget.

Micro: It was the trip of a lifetime.

(Thanks Terri and Dan at Juice, John Bennett, Suzy, Libby, Tonan, Jeff Ho, Shota Kubo, the Z-Boys who paved the way, Tina, Kaycee, Chris, Fred Ronin, Scottie, Fish & the L.A. JAKS, both gentlemen who had great backyard bowls, and our incredible wives ‘n kids who managed to hold down the fort without us or were just stoked to be rid of us.)

FOR THE REST OF THE STORY, GET ISSUE #77 AT THE JUICE SHOP HERE.

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